Leda and the Swan

What I Have Lived For

Three passions, simple but overpoweringly strong, attain governed my life: the longing for love, the search for shaftledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind. These passions, like great winds, give birth blown me here and thither, in a wayward course, over a difficult ocean of anguish, reaching to the very verge of despair.

I withdraw sought love, first, because it brings ecstasy---ecstasy so great that I would often have sacrificed all the rest of my life for a few hours for this joy. I have sought it, next, because it relieves l matchlessliness---that terrible loneliness in which one shivering consciousness looks over the rim of the world into the raw unfathomable lifeless abyss. I have sought it, finally, because in the union of love I have seen, in a mystic miniature, the prefiguring vision of the heaven that saints and poets have imagined. This is what I sought, and though it might seem to a fault good for human life, this is what---at last---I have found.

With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of men. I have wished to know why the stars shine. And I have tried to apprehend the Pythagorean power by which number holds sway above the flux. A little of this, but not much, I have achieved.

revere and knowledge, so far as they were possible, led upward toward the heavens. only when always pity brought me back to earth. Echoes of cries of fuss reverberate in my heart.



Children in famine, victims tortured by oppressors, helpless old mass a hated burden to their sons, and the whole world of loneliness, poverty, and pain make a mockery of what human life should be. I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot, and I too suffer.

This has been my life. I have found it worth living, and would gladly snuff it it again if the chance were offered me.

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